Rated R - naughty me

Stole the link from the lovely Michelle Rowen (go check out her new release, Fanged & Fabulous!!!!)

I know I haven't been blogging, well, at all. I have just run low (or out) of things to chat about. I'm going to the RWA convention this week, hopefully that will give me plenty of things (and photos teehee) to blab about for weeks to come.

Tell me how you are!

Obsessive is the way to go

I'm trying to turn a new leaf in everything. Write more. Keep my house in good shape. Be more organized. Be healthier. Etc. So far, so good. My house is starting to look pretty nice, I actually like spending time there now. I've worked on my book a bit. And I've been eating healthy and working out.

Something I've learned is that healthy eating is a struggle for me. It's not like I go get fast food everyday, or eat two pounds of pasta, my bad habit is eating processed foods because they are easy, cheap and quick. I hate to cook. I also struggle in trying to figure out what to eat, so I get frustrated and just grab a box of something.

Well I ain't gonna get healthy doing that. So, I put on my worn-out and overused obsessive hat and went to work. I have typed up menu pages with meal options for breakfast, lunch, dinner and a snack. Listing calories and such so I can quickly glance at options. I have also wrtiten out a daily plan listing the food I'll eat and my work-out. The food is broken down into things like 11 almonds, a tablespoon of salad dressing, 2/3 cup of cottage cheese, etc. I'm really crackin' down, folks.

But this is the piece de resistance (I have no idea how that's spelled, forgive me), I measured out ALL of my food. The other night I labeled ziplock bags to "hamburger," "turkey breast," "chicken," and "turkey sausage." The meats found in my daily food plan. They are all very, very lean cuts.

Then, I saw that the hamburger recipe called for 4 ounces, the turkey breast for 3.5 ounces, etc. So I grabbed my handy food scale and measured all the meat into those increments and put them in the labeled ziplocks for immediate freezer action. So my freezer is full of about 50 or 60 labeled ziplocks.

But it doesn't stop there. I have these mini tupperware containers that I have filled with tiny amounts of fat free mayo, sugar free jelly, unsalted peanut butter, whole almonds - some of the other things found in the meals.

And some meals call for two cups of salad, so I have measured that out into ziplock bags as well. And to prevent overdoing it on the salad dressing, I bought those new bottles of spray salad dressing in italian and balsamic vinigarette varieties. Both are rather good and only one calorie per squirt!

Have you imagined what my fridge looks like at this point? You may ask yourself why in the hell I would go through all that trouble. Well, I finally know myself well enough to confidently claim that if my food is not prepackaged, measured and ready to go, I won't go through the trouble of doing it when I'm hungry. Now it only takes me a couple minutes to grab the food and head to work.

You also may be thinking to yourself, "that's no way to live! Where's the freedom in the food?" First of all, I'm a super duper uper picky eater and only eat certain things anyway. Second, by eating so strict most days, I can afford a little splurge if I go to dinner with friends or something.

After only a couple of days, I feel so much better. It's amazing how much processed foods can make a person feel like crap without knowing it. I had no idea how crappy I felt until I started eating mostly fresh foods.

Anyone else as crazy as me and ever try something like this? We'll see if I keep it up, but I have some motivation to keep me going this time.

And the point of blogging this today was not to scare you or make you think I'm crazier than you already do, it's now out in the public and when I'm on the verge of quitting (as I'm sure will happen once or twice), I'll force myself to read it all over again.

Do you have any tips that got you healthier? Be it weight loss, lower cholesterol, more energy, etc.

Now if only I could start enjoying exercise...

Did you miss me?

Ok, let's pretend that my last post was not three months ago, that it was in fact three days ago. Can we all do that? I like pretend. It's a fun game. I'll give you a quick and dirty of how things are, well mostly good stuff anyway. The bad stuff has passed and I am now resuming life as normal (i.e. all of you lovely people in the blogosphere that I have missed like crazy).

I warn you, this will sound an awful lot like random stream of consciousness. Oh, and by the way check out my other blog post at our fantastic chapter blog (two posts in one day!?!)

But first! HUGE news people. I'm so flipping excited about this.

...drumrolling...

...drumrolling...

...drumrolling...

...letting the anticipation build a bit more...

Okay - Eli, or more formally the darling Elisabeth Naughton is a Golden Heart Finalist for her fan-freaking-tastic book Make Me Believe. I looooooooooooooooooove this book. And I'm not just blowing rose scented smoke up your bums. I tease her that she stalked me when she wrote this book (we didn't know each other at the time) because it has elements of so many of my personal passions and favorite things/subject matters. And the hero is based off of a somewhat obscure person who I have been in love with since the 5th grade. And the writing is stellar. The only reason I talk to her so much is so I can read her WIPs. (kidding, of course, well mostly) :P

I bought airfare to Dallas for RWA Nationals. I'm rooming with Eli and Alice like I did last year. We had a ball and I can't wait to do it over again. I need to finish my WIP so I have something to pitch, and for the sense of accomplishment and all that. I have curbed my Puzzle Pirates addiction, I'm so proud. Although my TeamSpeak addiction will not go away, however it's much easier to chat on a microphone and write than play a game and write. In fact it helps a bit. It puts me in a good mood, which helps with my writing. I've learned of some great new bands and I'm loving the music I'm listening too. I have written out an eating and exercise plan and I think it will work. So far so good. By the fall I should be close to my goal weight. Hmmm...what else...I'm running out of things to say. A momentous time in history folks.

Watch this video, you have to.

On a sadder note, my doggie died. My baby girl Roxy. Things are ok, me and my family are ok, but it's hard as many of you know I'm sure. So here is a picture of the cutest baby girl ever.

Ok, updates! How are all of you? Tell me all the juicy details!!! And I'm going to be getting caught up on some blog reading this weekend :)

Holy accents, Batman!

Have you heard of TeamSpeak? Wow. It's the coolest invention ever. You download the free program, get a free server and can talk to anyone in the world with a microphone. It's awesome. I've been talking to some online friends (coughs Puzzle Pirate friends coughs) and it's a hoot. Several of them are from England, so, I get to feed my UK accent addiction daily.

One of them from England has a deep voice. It's lovely. I could listen all day. And a couple of the girls are from the Netherlands and have adorable Dutch accents. Now if I could just get one of the Scottish folks to download TeamSpeak, I'd be set.

You should give this program a try to eliminate long distance calling, it's wonderful.

On the writing front I've been trying to outline the first book in a series that's been percolating for a few months. I've got an idea of the series, but need to get the book nailed down. It's going ok so far. I've never been so jazzed about an idea before, so we'll see how it goes.

It's a paranormal romance, but the research load will be horrendous and I've never written action scenes before. It will be a stretch for me as a writer, but well worth it.

How's your writing? Life in general?

I'm off to drool some more over the accents...

2007 To Do List

1. Finish this damn book.
2. Edit this damn book.
3. Submit this wonderful book (by the time I edit it won't be damned anymore).
4. Get healthy.
5. Write a second book.
6. Get my dog to listen to me so she a) stops peeing and pooping off the pee pad, b) doesn't eat her poop ever again, c) obeys when I call her or tell her to stay, d) cleans the house while I'm at work.
7. Travel to Scotland.
8. Get a passport (would make #7 much easier).
9. Buy and consume large amounts of Catto Whiskey.
10. Go to Canada (#8 is important still).
11. Get an agent.
12. Find a way to make chocolate help in weight loss.
13. Clean my house.
14. Keep my house clean.
15. Finish knitting the Baby Blanket To End All Baby Blankets.
16. Make a large dent in my debt.
17. Begin to enjoy eating vegetables (relates to #4).
18. Learn to at least tolerate exercise (again, to #4).
19. Get my hair to the length I want (may roll over into the 2008 To Do List).
20. Go to Scotland. Did I mention that one already? Well it's a biggie.

What's on your To Do List for this year?

A humorous post for you kilt aficionados

I thought this was hilarious. Posted by The Scottish Teabag Society on MySpace. Was on of his blog entries. Enjoy!

Crikey woman! Get your drunken hands out from under my kilt!
Current mood: Hoping for warm hands.
Category: Hoping for warm hands.

I'm sure you have also been a victim my friends. There you are, minding your own business and WHOSH! a sudden gush of cold air up your kilt and some drunken woman is trying to make her way thru the pleats in your kilt. I for one can't figure out how they get lost trying to get thru, but somehow they do. It would seem as easy enough task, you are one side of the kilt, my bare arse is on the other. You take a straight line thru and BINGO you get to grope me buns. But no, somehow there is some sign that a poor drunken girl follows that says "turn here", or "no, no, go this way" and they become hopelessly mired.

Now, it's one thing for an intoxicated woman to come up to you and ask if she can look under your kilt. You look for the police officer not to be in the immediate proximity, or the boyfriend to be of smaller stature than yourself, and you gracefully smile and tell her "well of course my dear". But after two or three minutes of hopeless groping your good humor is at an end. Especially when you are trying to maintain the conversation the women interrupted with your lady friend or potential lady friend. It breaks the rhythm if you know what I mean.

Being a gentleman, it is unacceptable to scold the woman. The only chivilous thing to do is help her of course! The easiest method as all kilt inspectors will tell you, is to take her hand and guide it up the side of your leg and quickly maneuver her hand around to the back before she can get her sharp, drunken claws into the front of you. Dangerous? Of course! But you knew the risk when you put your kilt on lad, there is nothing for it but to be bold, and quick!

As a seconary method, it is acceptable to lift the kilt for the woman. This has distinct advantages and disadvantages. If the woman appears to be very agressive, you may lose your ass if she is allowed to go in alone. And on the other hand, she may be faking her drunkeness and is just lulling you into a false sense of security you'll still lose your ass. So, save your ass and lift it for her.

I have had hundreds of women approach me. But my favorite groping from a woman was one that didn't say a word. She was walking behind me, raised my kilt, gave me arese the most loving little stroke and then continued walking on, with out even a "thank you very much". Ahhh, but the beauty and grace of her move was most excellently played.

So watch your ass out there mates and enjoy yourselves.